My way is the best way!
Posted in Skills and habits on August 13th, 2009 by Christiaan – 4 Comments
I’m sure somehow the title got your attention. How often is this true for something we do. Even in the face of better ways we stick to our old ways. A little while ago I had a discussion about being annoyed with other people, even when those people were no longer there. You know how that goes… Someone in the street decides to block your path with their baby stroller and cause a small traffic jam. Half a block later you’re still silently cursing the woman (or man, who says men can’t walk with a stroller) for being in your way.
Well, the person I was with has this habit of complaining about such things. People who don’t go aside, are rude or otherwise annoying. Public places are hell for him because of all the annoying people.
There was a major difference in how we dealt with the situation. He was constantly agitated and on edge, ready to snap a quick comment at just about anyone “annoying”. Most of the times he did make a comment I was left wondering what it was about. Only after asking did I realize his thoughts were still half a block in the past.
As much as I tried however, I didn’t manage to get this clear to him. Why be agitated about such things, they won’t change and all you end up doing is winding yourself up. Not to mention getting on my nerves because of the constant complaining about other people.
Human mirrors
But you see, somehow the habits we don’t like in others are actually the habits we don’t like in ourselves. Other humans are mirrors to us. It made me realize just how much I complain about other people. People who slack (in a bad way Carl…), people who don’t take things seriously that are important to me, people who waste money buying useless things, people who smoke in my vicinity. What’s more, I slack, I don’t take things seriously all the time, I sometimes waste money, and.. no, I don’t smoke.
And still I believe that how I do things is more often than not the best way of doing it. I couldn’t be further from the truth!
In the course of our lives we find our own ways of doing thing. Ways that work for us and of which we see no need to change them. Or they are so habitual that we just don’t see them at all. It’s here that we can learn a great deal from others for they truly are mirrors to our habits.
- Get agitated because someone doesn’t clean as much as you? Maybe you’re a clean-freak.
- Get annoyed with slow walkers? Maybe you’re a fast walker and they have a normal speed.
- Are people saying things behind your back? And you’re still complaining about them to the person next to you, half a block later?
- Do you behave a certain way to get something done but when someone else does that it’s outrageous?
Well, you get the idea don’t you.
If ever you find yourself thinking “My way is the best way” or getting all wound up about something. Ask yourself, will this really matter in a week or so. Why am I letting this small thing get to me. What is this telling me about myself. And the grand finale: Is my way really the best way?
