Mind the Beginner

What does coffee taste like?

How does the sun feel on your skin?

What’s it like to ride a motorcycle?

There are whole libraries written about these and other experiences trying to tell you what things are actually like without you have to experience them. Thousands or even millions of bloggers trying to tell you how awesome life is. But there is a problem there. Although it’s fascinating to read about other people’s experiences, or even to watch (hyper)realistic fiction on TV so you can join in the feelings, it’s not the same. Watching (or reading about) successful people and how they made it -while amusing- gets you nowhere. Time is spent living through other people and every once in a while you’ll hear “I wish I could do that” or “I wish that happened to me”.

You can never truly and accurately convey an experience.

A long time ago while training as a therapist a few people with disabilities were asked to help us understand things. Among them was a woman, blind from birth. One of the most intriguing questions asked was “If you dream, what do you dream about” Have you ever thought of it? Of course someone who lost their sight during life could still be able to dream images, but what if you’ve never had those images in the first place. The answer made sense: She dreamt conversation, sounds, smells and touch. All the other senses were there. She would feel the sun on her face, smell fresh spring air and heard birds sing.

Later on another question came to mine, but that later was many years later.
“How do you know when you are dreaming and when you are awake?”

Welcome to the matrix

It’s the classic “blue pill or red pill” here. How do you know that what is in front of you is reality. To cut that one short you will never know for sure that what you believe you experience is reality. This blog, religion, your body, it might all be a figment of your imagination.

Another thought that came up was how could you explain that woman what the sun looked like or what the color red was. In this example most people would easily understand that you can’t possibly convey that experience to the other, simply because there is no reference.

That blind woman could not argue with you that an apple is red or the sun golden. She had no reference, she never experienced it.
Now on to other examples, the most important being a religious experience. Can you tell someone what you experienced if they never experienced it and so have no reference? You can’t, you simply can’t… and still, there are so many out there who try constantly to convey that experience. Don’t they know you can’t pass experience on?

Enlightenment is in the eye of the beholder

You can’t argue about experience… ever. If someone experiences something a certain way, that’s their experience and you will never share that experience. If you believe it’s the same dive deeper.

This is Zen at it’s core. Every experience is unique, nothing is ever the same. Sure, you can refuse to dive deeper and claim that the experience is the same, but that would be superficial and almost an insult to your knowledge. Especially after reading this blogpost.

Deep down on some level everything is unique. Just because you haven’t had a religious experience involving an Aztec God doesn’t mean he isn’t there. Just because you’ve never had a near death experience doesn’t make the claim less legitimate.

• Experiences of all kinds are unique and personal
• You can’t convey an experience on it’s deepest level
• Nobody knows the truth, however you might experience it
• You will (probably) never know if your experience is the truth

It’s the experience of this truth that Zen Buddhists try to reach. They call it Satori or “Gaining insight”. That is, experiencing the truth through an intuitive knowing, a direct experience. But as soon as they logically try to capture it, it’s gone. As soon as you apply a filter you kill the truth. You can’t share it in any way. In the end, all you can do is invite other people to share an experience with you in real life, it’s the closest you’ll ever get.

What experience would you like to share?

Looking back

On March 13th 2009 I made my very first blogpost ever, starting the blog on a wordpress hosted domain. Right off the bat I can tell you that that was a mistake. I should have started on my own domain from the beginning. My old domain is still getting more traffic every day than where you are now. Over the year this blog has had several small and big changes made to it. Ranging from new layouts, inserting images and discovering some useful HTML features all the way up to getting a clearer focus on what this blog is about.

I started out blogging about “A little blog on beginning, it sounds so simple but it’s quite complex.” this changed to ” lifestyle design and personal development with a Zen twist” and now I finally got down to what really gets me going: “Thoughts from a Zen mind in a Western World”. My view on just about anything and everything in my daily life. At times confronting and perhaps even a bit extreme, but always honest.

All I knew was that I wanted to learn how to write and connect with people around the world. I was looking for affirmation that there were more like-minded people out there. Also, I wanted to learn more about the dynamics of online marketing and social media. To do that you need some sort of platform to promote obviously. So it became twofold: connecting with minds and learning how to market.

Right now

Looking around at other bloggers who started out at just about the same time as I did (Corbett Barr and Carl R. Nelson to name two) you might be tempted to say that this blog is a very slow grower and I must be doing something wrong with the marketing. That could well be the case, I like to think the main reason is that these two put so many hours in their blogmarketing that they deserve it. There is no secret way of doing this, it comes down to putting in the hours. (That, and I haven’t done any guestposts)

Looking around you might also conclude that I’m doing rather well. For the first time in the history of this blog the feedburner counter jumped the 200 mark. It took me 8 months to reach 100, and 4 months to go up to 20o. May I conclude that I will be at 300 subscribers in another 2 months? (and 400 one month later). That would bring me well over 1000 subscribers in the next year. 300 Subscribers is one of my goals for this year as you might recall and it looks very much within reach.

Another awesome thing happened to me this year of blogging. For the very first time in my personal history I actually earned money through without selling a physical object. Although I’m no where near my goal of the $500 a month goal I set seeing money being transferred into your paypal account from a sale is empowering, no matter the amount! It gives a sense of accomplishment. And thinking about one of my initial intentions to start blogging, I’ve marketed my blog effectively enough to earn a few dollars. The theory that you can earn money through blogging is now a fact to me. I can now honestly say I know.

Personal things

Learning how to write has had a significant impact on how I think and express my thoughts. Developing the skill to put to words what you are thinking is very powerful and if this was the only thing that blogging would have brought me I would be a very happy man. But of course there is more to blogging than just that. It also thought me how to stand up for what I think a bit more. I’m still trying to keep friends with everybody at times but there are moments when you can quite simply agree with me or be wrong!

I am a blogger and I am in it for the long haul. Personal experience and thought will never dry up and as long as that is there you’ll be reading about it here. Blogging taught me how to express myself, how to market a website and how to use social media to that end. Through blogging I’m very happy to have made friends all over the world, loyal readers and honest critics. Thank you!

Looking forward

We made it this far. So what’s next? Life and business are nowhere without a direction, a goal, a set of values. You can always come here and read about the world through my eyes, I will keep doing the best I can to offer you high-value content and meaningful blogposts to think about. Ruthless honesty and simplicity are my main values here and that is what you will get. My ultimate goal is to have this blog grow to well over 1000 subscribers, for however long that takes. Once there, nothing will actually change except the number of readers you can connect with to discuss my thoughts.

Are there other plans as well? Of course! I’m thinking about a few things: guestposting, a second blog, an eBook, learning CSS and HTML, more serious marketing to get my name out there as a blogger, the blogger on the subject of Zen thinking and the effects it has on life in terms of personal development, lifestyle design, minimalism, productivity and simplicity. You get the idea don’t you?

This first year was awesome! Thank you for your continued support. Hang on to your seat, it’s going to be a wild ride from here.

A small request

As a closing thought on this blogpost I’m going to ask you for your help. If you think this blog has added value to your life in any way, please spread the word. Backlink on your blog, tweet  and urge others to subscribe to my RSS feed.Thanks again, I would be nowhere without you.

A blind man left his village and followed the winding path through the forest. He was on his way to see his friend in the neighboring hamlet. After his arrival, the two friends spent many happy hours together. At last, it was time for the blind man to return to his village.

“Here,” his friend said, “it is already nightfall. Take this lantern with you.”

“Lantern? What good is a lantern to a blind man?” he asked.

“It is to avoid accidents. It will help other travelers on the narrow path see you coming.”

With this thought in mind, the blind man took the lantern; thanked his friend, and went on his way. While plodding along the meandering path, he enjoyed the cool, fragrant mist which enveloped both him and the sound of chirping crickets. However, imagine his surprise when nearly home, he suddenly collided with a huge man.

“Fool! Why don’t you watch where you’re going?” the big man shouted.

“Why didn’t you see my lantern?” asked the blind man.

“Lantern? Oh, yes, . . . Well, the candle is out!”

An interesting story, but you might wonder what the significance of it all is. Well, see the lantern as the Truth, it enlightens everything around it. All is good until the lantern gets handed down the line for the ones recieving it can’t see the lantern for what it really is. Claiming to carry the truth but it’s no longer enlightening. Is it the same latern anymore, having lost it’s function?

Exactly this is what happens all around us, we get something handed down but don’t know what it really is. We just assume it’s right (a burning lantern) and blindly we follow it, never seeing that the lantern in fact is no longer enlightening us. What’s more we tell others that it’s the lantern of Truth and hand it down to them, further and further it goes, but what is actually passed on?

Assuming that what we are being told is the truth is all around us. If we didn’t assume things teachers would have a very hard time trying to teach. All we can do is assume they are right. But should we always take it for the truth? Who says the ones teaching us know the Truth? Sometimes it’s better to experience for yourself. Nobody can teach you the taste of coffee, the pain of hitting a wall or the loss of subscribers because of a sales pitch. Some things you’ll just have to experience for yourself in order to know what is and what isn’t true.

Question what others claim to be true and experience for yourself, it truly is the best way to learn and it makes a far greater impact. The best lessens in life are learned this way.

Nan-in, a Japanese master during the Meiji era (1868-1912), received a university professor who came to inquire about Zen.

Nan-in served tea. He poured his visitor’s cup full, and then kept on pouring.

The professor watched the overflow until he no longer could restrain himself. “It is overfull. No more will go in!”

“Like this cup,” Nan-in said, “you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup?”

Have you ever heard of value rigidity or conceptual rigidity? You encounter them either in yourself or in others every day of your life. It’s where your opinions and perspectives preclude you from seeing things in a new light or appreciate something new. Incapable of letting go of your cherished view of the world or some part of it you reject anything that does not fit in according to how you look upon things. Like the professor, your cup is full and you’re not inclined in the least to empty it so something new can fit in. Preconceptions rule your view, you’re stuck.

Does this sound like you? It might not, maybe it reminds you of somebody you know. Value rigidity and conceptual rigidity are the products of a closed mind. Keeping an open mind helps prevent or perhaps overcome these issues. That is, if you’re bothered by them at least. It might be that the closed mind has become a refuge, a safe haven where you feel (or that person you know feels) comfortable and getting out of that safety into an uncertain world would be terrifying.

In Pirsig’s “Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance” The story is presented of the old South Indian monkey trap as an illustration of value rigidity. The trap consists of a coconut or small box with a hole that is bog enough for the monkey’s open flexible hand to fit through, but to small for his clenched fist. The trap is baited with whatever food it is the monkey would find appealing and the trap is fastened to a tree or stake. Of course the monkey has no problems with getting his furry little hand into the hole and grab the food, but getting that clenched fist out, well, let’s just say we now have a very confused and frustrated monkey with his hand stuck in a hole. The obvious solution to the Homo Sapiens monkeybrain would be to let go of the food for the moment and find another way. Evolution wasn’t to kind on our little furry friend though and he just can’t wrap is head around it. The food in his hand is to important to let go, no matter the cost. Enter our South Indian friend, exit monkey and enter monkey stew…

Now this story might seem silly but it’s something that happens in a daily basis. Have you ever attended a class where beforehand you “knew” that it would be boring? Perhaps even an entire course that has you feeling depressed beforehand just because what you’ve been told by students who have already taken that course. In a few weeks the new semester will begin at my university and we (my fellow students and me) have already started to size up the courses, trying to figure out what to expect. Combine this with my rigid idea that I’m allergic to math and things get ugly. Especially when it turned out that there are not one, but two courses labeled “math” that I will be taking. Panic is slowly flowing into my thoughts as the semester closes in for the kill. But still I can’t let go of the old idea that math is evil. For over ten years now, my math-cup has been full. Letting go of what you think you know will allow you to experience what’s really going on. How do you know something is no good if you haven’t experienced it first hand without preconceptions?

The first step in dealing with rigidity is awareness. I hope you saw that one coming a mile away as it’s the first step in solving just about any problem out there. You can’t solve a problem if you don’t know it’s there, obviously. To expand solutions to these issues, you have to expand conceptual boundaries. Sometimes the expansion of conceptual boundaries requires reducing value rigidity. Narrow-mindedness might stop you from seeing the solution because it’s outside of your current views. You know value rigidity or conceptual rigidity is present when you hear something or read something that sets off a mental alarm and you feel your mind racing, picking up arms and getting ready to brawl. Now you actually have a choice right at that moment – if you are aware of your mind getting ready – either you let your mind run wild, or you let yourself relax and examine what it is that set off the alarm. Examine it without prejudging.

No expectations, no preconceptions, no rigidity. The open mind is supple and alert, ready for anything because anything can happen. The closed mind is rigid, tense and brittle refusing to acknowledge things that can happen that are outside the box.

In a post a while back I started with the quote:

Those who know do not speak;

Those who speak do not know.

Shunryu Suzuki, a Soto-zenpriest who lived in San fransisco in the 1960’s elaborated this one a bit further when his pupils were asking about this.

You are all enlightened until you open your mouth

Well, so far so good. What’s the problem with talking you might ask, the biggest problem is that we’re all full of shit and talking about just about anything will only make things worse because we can’t seem to properly convey what it is we are thinking. So indeed, we are enlightened (or at least seem that way) until we start speaking. And the longer we speak the bigger the hole we dig for ourselves for sooner or later people will catch on and realize we’re full of it.

The hammer leads the way

Going through life trying to convince others that you’re right or you know the path to enlightenment isn’t the way to go. The best way (at least according to Zen) is to lead by example and above all, to shut up about it as the words simply won’t get the message across…

..If you doubt this try the following simple experiment:

- Read this sentence: “I just got hit in the head with a hammer and it hurts”

-Now do the following: Hit yourself in the head with a hammer, does it hurt?

A world of difference I should hope.

Reading about something or talking about it isn’t the same as “it”. Truly those who know do not speak for trying to capture something in words will fail.

So keep your mouth closed, and at least pretend you know. An outsider won’t see the difference. But as soon as you start talking you’re doomed.

On the other hand, there are so many bloggers out there who are leading the way. The biggest problem being the only way they can tell you what they are doing is by “talking” (typing) so you can follow them. It’s a flawed system that ultimately will always leave gaps in experience. That’s perfectly alright though, as long as you realize this.

You’re all enlightened, now keep quite!

…the power of silence.

I’m currently reading Alan Watts’ The way of zen and in the preface I came across a very nice idea on the difference between zen and western thinking:

I can not represent myself as a scientifically objective academician, for – with respect to Zen – this seems like studying birdsong in a collection of stuffed nightingales.

Alan describes his attempt to study Zen in a Western way. In a very short version, Zen values direct experience over reading about something or other ways to try and understand. It’s a huge difference between Eastern and Western thinking. Whereas a Westerner will read about nightingales, watches videos of them, listen to recordings, study stuffed nightingales and look them up at the zoo in the hope they will sing and Easterner will more likely go directly too the zoo or -if possible- look nightingales up in the wild and just sit there enjoying their song. For he knows that reading will not make him experience birdsong.

This difference in thinking is everywhere. In Western thinking not being able to put an experience to words somehow seems a weakness. We use an abstract alphabet with which we make words (code) to describe things. The individual words don’t even look like what they want to describe. Chinese words (characters) in some way actually look like what they mean and in this way work more with images than total abstract code. A step closer to the real thing. But still, birdsong can not be written down correctly.

The more educated someone is the more he will try to capture experience in code, having fancier words to do so. The number of words an academic knows if after all far greater than someone who dropped out of highschool (in general). But it’s also harder for this academic to admit he can’t describe something accurately. He’s a master in the code but the code just doesn’t work for him. Frustrating.

There is a saying in Zen that explains this and at the same time explains why Zen is so vague to Westerners:

Those who know do not speak;

Those who speak do not know.

Zen “Masters” know this and so they don’t speak, what’s more, if they were to speak most of them just don’t have sufficient mastery over the code (English language) to express themselves. In fact, Zen isn’t all that hard at all and it’s certainly not vague. It’s just that the code is so limiting to them both in possibilities and in their mastery of it, and the Chinese (and Japanese) language work in a totally different way.

The obserant reader can now quickly say “Hey, you’re speaking… you do not know!” *points finger and laughs*

This is very true! I do not know about Zen. I’m a total novice in Zen and read just about anything I can get my hands on instead of direct experience. On the other hand I do sit in meditation every single evening and work on experiencing Being. Am I better than you? Most certainly not, truth be told you’d do better at meditating than I would for I’m hindered by everything I’ve read and now expect from meditation. I shot myself in the foot.

So here’s what you can take out of this blogpost: Don’t shoot yourself in the foot by reading about what you should be experiencing. Get out there and listen to the birds.

I don’t know where I’ve read it exactly (might have been Seth’s purple cow but I’m not sure) but on the Internet if people perceive you to be an expert in something, you are an expert.

Somehow I find this very dangerous, I’ve been blogging on several topics over the past months and already I have the feeling of people somehow looking up to me. Imagine the influence a blogger has who has been blogging for years.

Take myself for instance. For all you know I might be an elderly lady living in Canada somewhere bored out of my skull and in a flash of insanity decide to impersonate a 26 year old Dutch guy who’s into zen, personal development and lifestyle design.

Think about it, all you’ve seen from me is a single photo, I’ve never done a video blogpost, no podcasts or anything. Even the few people I’ve been talking to through google talk or twitter have never seen anything else than that one picture (no wait, a second picture of me in a suit which was also the picture I used on this blog a while back) and never heard my voice or anything.

How do you know I’m “the real deal”? How do you know I’m who I say I am. For that matter, how do you know who’s real on the Internet, who’s authentic. In most cases you’re limited to blind faith, you might get proof through a video blog, more pictures or other visuals and audio but can you every be certain? This is actually a recurring theme in zen. Only through experiencing for yourself can you be sure to some extent. Reading about it, hearsay, or whatever other channels won’t do it for you. It’s part of beginner’s mind, everything is new and what’s in front of you has never before been nor will it ever be again.

How do you know it’s hard to breathe on top of Mt. Everest, have you ever been there? It’s highly plausible, but you don’t actually know do you… If you start going to college with this attitude you’re in trouble, no textbook could ever teach you something, you’d have to experience everything for yourself.

“Breaking your neck and damaging your spinal cord on the C3 level will paralyze your respiratory muscles and without an iron lung, you will die”

“yeah right, that’s what you’re claiming, but is it true?”

“Allow me to demonstrate….”

-Famous last words of a medical student

Anyone can claim just about anything on the Internet and as soon as someone believes it, it’s true all of a sudden. It’s like the guy in a white coat and a stethoscope in a commercial. Somehow people think he’s a doctor and so what he’s saying is true. Dangerous.

You can’t do anything about it, everyone can claim anything, either you believe them or you don’t. But be sensible about it, if someone has something to gain by making a certain claim alarm bells should go off at the very least.

On the other hand you could trust in the honesty of other humans.

Who’s authentic on the Internet… … I’d like to believe I am but I can’t prove it beyond the shadow of a doubt without us meeting face to face and that would be a bit impractical now wouldn’t it (Traveling isn’t good for my old Canadian bones).

Are you who you claim to be? Are you authentic? How can you prove it?

I haven’t always been a lifestyle designer with a zen twist, it had to start somewhere and I can blame it all on a book that probably everyone who is into lifestyle design knows by now. The four hour workweek by Tim Ferris. This book opened my eyes to the possibilities of Internet and changed my view on “work”. This is not the only book however so I’m presenting you with a list of the books that had the biggest influence on me. Some of these I read before I read the 4HWW and although I wasn’t familiar with “lifestyle design” I guess I was already working on it. In no particular order these books are:

Tim Ferris – The four hour workweek
A book dedicated to lifestyle design. Promoting the 80/20 way of thinking and letting me know that my dreams can become real goals. If this book didn’t exist this blog might just have never existed as well. As I said, this book nudged me in the right direction and gave my way of thinking a name.

Shunryu Suzuki – Zen mind, Beginners mind
A small book about zen meditation and real life. This book tells you just about anything you want to know about Zen Buddhism that’s worth knowing. It was my first book specifically about zen and I still think it’s one of the best I have. I started reading about zen roughly two years ago and had my very first zazen meditation session on June 7th 2008. I’ve been meditation a year now and the changes are huge. I’ve become calmer, more focused and everything has become so much clearer.

Tony Buzan – The speed reading book
I bought this book yeas ago to learn how to speed read. Although I haven’t managed to reach my target of 1000 words a minute but my reading definitely got faster because of this book. In this information age we’re constantly bombarded with information, most of it in writing. How many hours a day do you read blogs, articles, websites, books, newspapers? This book has the power to cut your reading time in half easily. Or you could read twice as much in the same time. The normal reading speed for adults is roughly 200-300 words a minute. The record holder is Sean Adams with 3850 words a minute. There is wide gap there, even though you probably won’t reach the 3000 words a minute, even 1000+ words a minute will change your life.

Rolf Potts – Vagabonding, an uncommon guide to the art of long-term world travel
Although I’m not a vagabond (yet) this book showed me that travel doesn’t need to be expensive. I’ve always dreamed of traveling, this book has offered me the tools and tips to make those dreams into goals. I think this is one of the essential books to read for anyone into lifestyle design. And anyone who wants to become a Location Independent Professional (LIP) probably already read this one.

Peter Ralston – The principles of effortless power
This is the book for anyone who is interested in the internal martial arts. It completely changed my thinking about T’ai Chi that I was practicing at the time. I found a Cheng Hsin group (Cheng Hsin being the martial art that Peter developed) near my home and started training there. Although I haven’t trained in over a year now this book and the training changed the way I move. It’s hard to explain this book but if you practice aikido, t’ai chi or any other internal martial art please pick up this book if you haven’t already. You might also want to read this book if you dance for a living or are a physiotherapist.

Karen Kingston – Clear your clutter with Feng Shui
Although I’m not much for Feng Shui this book still provided me with some great insight. It’s this book that initially got me to minimalize my living space. Although it’s not minimal yet I’ve been working at reaching the 100 things I wrote about a few months ago. Do you have clutter in your home or do you know someone who is a clutterbug? This is the book for you. With 183 pages you can easily read this book in an evening. A warning though, if you read this book you will want to clear your clutter right away. It’s addictive.

J.J. Gibbs – Dancing with your books, the zen way of studying
I bought this book when I was struggling with the last part of my bachelor’s degree. Now I think of it and see an underlined passage, this book was the reason I started zazen meditation. The underlined passage: “On practice that should be incorporated into everyone’s program of study is daily meditation… The purpose of meditation is to relax and silence the constant internal dialogue that goes on in our mind so you can devote your full attention to studying.” I bought the book on March 23d 2008 (I have the habit of writing the date inside the book at the same time I write my name in it.) This book will change how you think about studying, it will become fun!

Michael Masterson – Automatic wealth for grads
Together with “Your money or your life” this book changed the way I think about money. I was terrible with money and squandered thousands of euro’s, I have no idea where it all went. But now I have an overview (down to the cent) of all my spendings, assets and liabilities. I live below my means as much as possible and have realized that it’s perfectly possible to eventually reach the crossover point (The point where the income from your invested capital surpasses your monthly expenses, your basic life necessities and all the components of your chosen lifestyle, are covered by your monthly investment income.) within my lifetime. Although both these books are written for people who work (the 9-5 grind) I plan on using the knowledge in this book to reach that point with my freedom business. One of the big goals in my life is reaching this crossover point.

Robert M. Pirsig – Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance
The only novel in my list. If ever a novel had an impact on it’s reader it’s this one. From the back cover “The most explosive book you will ever read!” and I agree. This book will make you think about your thinking and about the world. Although I don’t have much to say about this book, if you haven’t read it yet, please do! This book made me think deeper about everything, taking nothing for granted.

What books influenced your life? What books should we read? Please tell us about the books you think we should read in the comments.

This blogpost is part one of a series of five exploring the Stoic psychological tactics that can be used to rediscover joy in your life.

Some of you might have already heard of the stoics or perhaps even read some of the things they have written. Most well known of the Roman Stoics are Seneca, Marcus Aurelius, Musonius Rufus and Epictetus. What set these people apart from others was their ability to take joy in the simplest of things and at the same time the willingness to give everything up on a moments notice without grief. This was what first got me interested in the stoics, how can it be that they handled negative emotions so well and were able to give everything up so easily. Some of them even gave their lives in this manner.

Negative visualization

Any thoughtfull person will at times think about the bad things that can happen to him. The main reason being to prevent them from happening. But no matter how hard we try to prevent these things from happening there are plenty of bad things that will happen to us. We will get sick from time to time and we most certainly will loose things that are dear to us. The Stoics solved this by negative visualization. Thinking of the bad things that might just happen and thus “He rob present ills of their power who have has perceived their coming beforehand”. Also, misfortune has the biggest impact on those who “expect nothing but good fortune”. Both the Stoics and Buddhists agree on this and state the “all things are perishable”. If we don’t keep this in mind and think the things dear to us will always be there we will suffer considerable distress when it’s gone.

So now we have two reasons for negative visualization:

• To foresee bad things that might happen and prevent them from happening
• To realize that the things we hold dear won’t last forever

Hedonic adaptation

And then there is a third reason, a reason all to familiar to modern consumers. The psychologists Loewestein an Frederick studied what they called Hedonic adaptation. it’s the initial rush of excitement when we finally get something we always wanted followed by a form of depression where we take what we once coveted for granted. Be it a book, a dress, a car, a job or a life partner. (And one for the digital nomads: your passport) Upon reaching the goal we had set we keep looking for bigger things and seem never to be happy with what we have.

How do we break this cycle? This is where the negative visualization has it’s biggest impact. We should try and stop this cycle and in part even reverse it. To illustrate what I mean: how happy are with the computer you are reading this on? How happy were you the first day you used it? There is a difference isn’t there? Where did this difference come from and why are you no longer as happy now as you were back then?

Hedonic adaptation has the power to rob us from all the joy we have in life. In stead of delighting in life’s joys we take everything for granted and lose interest.
To someone who is constantly adapting the glass is half empty.
To a stoic, not only is the glass half full, he also has a glas (it could get stolen or broken) and to top things of it’s a glass and not even a ceramic pot. It doesn’t give a peculiar taste to the liquid inside and you can even enjoy the color of the liquid! What a wondrous thing this glass is that we take for granted.

Going back to the computer, how would you feel about not having it anymore? Perhaps you need to send it in for repairs and you get an inferior model on loan for the time being.

Stoic toolbox

Negative visualization is the single most powerful tool in the stoic toolbox. In the simplest form it’s spending time visualizing loosing the things you value most. In modern times think along the lines of loosing your job, having your car stolen or the death of a loved one.

Why would you want to do this? Seems very depressing doesn’t it. Actually this is a great source of joy believe it or not. Think that your car gets stolen every night and when you wake up and it’s still there you’re thankful that you still have it.

The stoics advise us to live every day like it is our last. This doesn’t mean spending all your money like there is no tomorrow and doing whatever you want regardless of the consequences it has on tomorrow. This is simply an extension of this negative visualisation technique. We should periodically contemplate the fact that we will not live forever and that this day might just be our last. Such thinking will not convert us to Hedonism but will make us appreciate how wonderful it is that we are alive and have the opportunity to fill this day with activity. This will in turn make it less likely that we will squander our days. After all, if this was your last day, would you procrastinate while waiting for the end to come?

Stoic zen and lossing a loved one

Don’t stop planning for tomorrow but keep in mind to appreciate today as well, or as Zen Buddhists would say: live in this moment.
One day in our lives will be the last day, one of our cups of coffee will be the last we ever drink and one kiss we give to our loved one will be the last we ever give them.
How often is it that people become depressed when one of their parents dies thinking along the lines of “I should have told them I loved them more often” or “We should have gone on that fishing trip when we still could.” If you still have your parents and have things you want to do, go do them now! You never know what tomorrow will bring after all.
It sounds depressing perhaps but give it a try. You’ll appreciate everything so much more and will receive joy from the simplest of things. After all, it might just be the last time you can do this, so make it count. Don’t get depressed about it, be thankful that the things we hold dear our in our lives, be thankful that you have a computer to read this post, after all, you’re computer might get stolen tonight.

Negative visualization will stop you from sleepwalking through life.

The posts in the Stoic psychological tactics series:

1. Negative Visualisation

2. The Dichotomy of control

3. Fatalism

4. Self-denial

5. Meditation

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As you sit reading this blogpost, close your eyes for a second and feel your body. The way you are sitting now, is probably the way you always sit. Maybe hanging to one side a bit more, maybe rotating your spine in some way. Are you sitting symmetrical?

The way we sit is just one of many things that have become habits. Our lives are filled with thousands of these micro habits we normally call “it’s just the way I do that”. Every time you brush your teeth you do it roughly in the same order, with the same motions and while standing in the same pose. And how about grabbing the toothpaste, twisting off the cap, putting it back on again.

Most of these habits have developed because they seem the best way to do things. It’s perfectly okay to have these although they offer one small problem: We do things on the automatic pilot. Have you ever driven back home because you don’t know if you locked the front door you’ll know what I mean.

Everything you do, do it consciously.

A great way to jolt your brain a bit and get out of the daily grind is do everything differently. The easiest way to do this is to do everything with the other hand for a change. Immediately you have to think about every motion you make. Pick up your computer mouse and put it on the left side of your screen. Now goof around a bit and see if you can match the precision and speed you normally have with that mouse cursor.

But why do you want to get of autopilot

It’s fun Or at least, it can be fun if you let it and don’t get frustrated that things go so much slower. Do them enough and things will speed up greatly.

Your brain will benefit from it As with anything in our body the phrase “use it or loose it” also applies to our brain. It’s always a good idea to stimulate the brain and let it experience new things.

Adaptation You’ll learn more ways of doing things, maybe making for some good laughs, maybe coming in handy when your normal way of doing things doesn’t work in this specific situation.

Variation is healthy If you always sit in the same position, your back will eventually change to accommodate that posture better. You’ll probably develop a scoliosis because of it. Always carry a backpack over your right shoulder only and in a few years your back will show this habit, even if you’re not wearing the pack at that time.

The single downside as I mentioned is that things will most certainly go slower. We have fine tuned our micro habits to perfection and sometimes we’ll have spend thousands of hours during our life so far in doing things in this particular way.

I have compiled a short list of daily activities that you might want to take a closer look at to see if there are any micro habits in there:

• toweling off after taking a shower
• getting dressed
• putting on your seat belt
• turning around
• opening a door
• chewing your food
• going to the toilet
• grabbing your wallet

Now this is were zen comes in again. Zen has the deliberate practice of getting off auto pilot and being fully aware of what is going on. Everything you do, do it consciously. For the remainder of the day I would like you to give it a try. Do every little thing with deliberation, pay full attention to every movement you make. Zen goes even deeper into this claiming that every situation is new and unique. So every situation deserves it’s own way of handling it. Brushing your teeth today is not the same as yesterday. So why do it the same way? They call it beginner’s mind. Seeing everything for what it really is: totally new and unique.

You’ll probably get confused at some stage because now you’re using a different part of the brain to do these tasks. As I said, it’s a great way to jolt the brain a bit.

Have fun!